*Originally blogged on a different site on July 1, 2011
When I first started this blog, I stated that I would be writing about things that I like and maybe you will like them too…etc. Then I thought to myself, Lindsay, you love to dislike things. You could write about that too!
No, no! I replied to myself. Nobody likes a complainer. But you know what? I am a complainer. I will always be a complainer. So now I am going to write about something I DON’T like, and maybe you will dislike it too, and then everyone can still be happy.
This morning, despite being horribly sick (and with a nosebleed to boot, why?), my killer Chihuahua Diego was whining to go out. I know, he’s so inconsiderate. I stuffed a rolled up piece of toilet paper in my nose, got the leash, and headed out with my white fluff ball. I’ve been living in the same place for over a year now, so Diego and I have our little routine and all of the neighbors know that DIEGO IS NOT FRIENDLY. He barks and pulls at the leash and gets all anxious whenever other dogs are around, especially if he is trying to poop. Everyone always gets offended about this, too, as if I purposely trained an attack dog or something. So Diego walked out, casually peed next to the pee bushes, and then ambled over to the pooping area. “Come on Diego, go potty before any other dogs come out!” I tried to coax him to hurry up for both of our happiness, but no. He had to smell everything. Again.
All of a sudden, I heard a sleigh bell…damn, not a sleigh bell, another dog’s clinking leash and tags. Ugh. A lady with a black poodle approached. I’m pretty sure I’ve told her Diego isn’t friendly about 10 times. “Good mooooooorning!” She greeted us, Oprah style. Diego greeted her back with a nice long series of barks. I didn’t even bother telling her he’s not friendly this time, I just started walking the other way, pulling Diego along with me. That didn’t last long, though, because here comes the girl with twin pugs. They are twins because they are together. I don’t like their barks, either, by the way. They sound like Chewbacca or something else beastly. She saw Diego and me struggling, so she decided to come at us a little more aggressively. To prove how much better her dogs are than mine (or perhaps just because she is a little more friendly than me), she brought her dogs right up to Oprah and her poodle and they started chatting away. Cool, whatever, I could still leave, and that was still my plan, but then this guy came up the sidewalk with a black lab. I can’t say I’m surprised though, Dog People love to chat it up in the mornings. (I hope you didn’t forget that there’s a huge roll of toilet paper shoved into my nose…) I dragged Shmiegy over to another grassy area and demanded poop. Right now. To my surprise, Shmiegy complied! He did two circles to the right, and ta-da! He started barking again immediately after, but I don’t care. At least he pooped and I don’t have to go out there for a few hours.
So I guess that this story isn’t actually about something I don’t like, it’s about something I do like. I like it when Diego goes potty outside, even under extreme circumstances.
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